Sunday, February 20, 2011

Back to Back

It's not me, it's you.
Yeah, we both know that.
I don't want nothin'
outta you that you wanna keep.
You just play.
We both know that, too.
Cards, ballin', head games;
That's a full life you've got going there.
Well, my fun times and good ear
should be moving on.
Don't wanna burn on the bridge
as it goes up, so wave and turn your back
on me and my gas can.
Pull it back in, lock it up tight.
Believe it's not there.
Head back to games that don't scare.

Thursday, February 10, 2011

Lessons in Flannel

I have a red shirt, faded and worn,
smelling faintly of vanilla.
It never makes it quite to the hanger;
it just calls to be put on.
It's never buttoned or accompanied by
other items of clothing.
It's partnered, instead, with snapshots
of you, watching me laugh with serious eyes
and bemused, half-smile on your face.
That was the moment, the second I knew
that given the time, it was you
who could see me exactly as me
and end the cliff jumping for good.
That safe and secure could never be boring,
comfort a gateway to weakness.
I wish we'd had the red shirt before
when we first wanted each other.
The decade between could have filled the void
of the photos not taken and saved.  I regret
the years of missing that look and you quietly telling me why
you liked the shirt and loved me in it.
That path we ignored, then came back to, too late,
makes the hardest word, simply, Goodbye.

Kicked Puppy

I am a stupid girl.
Self-preservation not a strong point.
Running like mad toward the edge of a cliff
Convinced that flying can happen.
And even if it's just a long fall
What a rush that last step will be
Blood pumping, hair blowing
wind on my skin and roaring in my ears.
Adrenaline addiction
So what if the river below is dry as a bone this time?
Broken and bleeding and twisted on rocks
is fine if I land on my back
so looking up the sheer cliff face
at the sky, the edge, the trees
perhaps I'll see a flock of birds, clouds,
maybe a lone eagle. 
Then, truthfully, I'll be able to say
"For a moment, I joined you."

Thursday, February 3, 2011


You do some of your best work in denial
Convince yourself, convince yourself
That Evil is real, punishable by death
That doing right by harm proves it
Staying afloat seals it
Violence and force aren’t just another part
Flipside to the planet, nature, universe, us
Convince yourself, convince yourself
That one of your extremes is the bad side
When it’s just another piece
Manipulation that is almost lie
Heap abuse on others and you
When control slips what can you make them do
Convince yourself, convince yourself
That the dead were murdered
And the killer must pay
That selfishness is a fatal flaw
That to reveal what you are is at best a deal killer
That crazy is a reason rather than a life
Convince yourself, to hide your flipside
From you, from me, friends, not foes
Hit the next level of crazy and run/hide
Wake up decades earlier a week later
Don’t get played, all the while playing
Convince yourself, what’s in your blood
You put there, maybe you did or maybe not
Maybe it’s just the cards since the world is harsh
Torture yourself on the rack of judgment
When you do what you do
Neither you is right, nor is he wrong
There has never been just one
We are all cut in two